How People Are Around Me

People can't just wish they could be mean to you for a reason that exists when what happened was, like, I was really sent signals to call someone the "n" word, signaled by herself.

People are being mean to me racially as an excuse for me to stop mattering in anything I say.  I know this is totally unfair.

It seems that every time Johnny Depp comes out with another huge movie that something like this happens.  He's a good guy.  I don't understand everyone's jealousy.  I know that's also a sin, like not realizing that I didn't even do anything literally that needs to be forgiven but that needs to be forgotten because I didn't do it out of my own suggestion.  It was out of the suggestion of who I did it to.  Other people are the ones doing the deed to be mean to me.

It seems people are upset that I feel more comfortable with Johnny Depp, in a way, partly because I got used to being a fan as of now.  I'm also from the same area partly.  I'm guessing they think it's unfair in and of itself that for some reason he's very risque to them because they want to feel that way.  That's how I feel now, in generality.  I don't think people should play around in such a bad way with things Johnny Depp does that consider different in general that they didn't do before they knew him because that's been a specific trend going on.

I just felt some of a good feeling, though, like a feeling of being in another world, I suppose where no one can harm me.  It was a line of flesh pumping up the side of my waist that felt like it wasn't me doing it.

I'm tired of people thinking they need to suggest some insult to me when supposedly none was suggested to them for something similar.

I think people just want to embarrass me and make me feel uncomfortable.  They won't stop, even if I try to forget about them.  I hope things change and get better.

People can't be so possessive of what they do in learning how to hate me, neither.  They think it's something they have to do.  Lots of people call people the "n" word when it wasn't because someone acted like they wanted to be called that.  True, it might be different kinds of people, though, but that's another reason this is so awkward for me.  People understand it was a misunderstanding or not, meaning they wanted me to do it, which seems to be what's surfacing unspoken-ly, so why not just realize that and stop bothering me?  I know somewhat it's a safety precaution.  I have to look into that it's for the fact that they might accidentally call me something more strongly.  I've been a bit harmed, though, somehow, too.  People just have to have it.

Do people feel bad about something you thought and that they did ask for?  They just pretend these feelings weren't true?  ... or am I wrong?

If there were more reasons to do something, that doesn't mean the person is wrong if there is an underlying reason otherwise.

Also, if you don't like something about a parent, it doesn't mean the child has to be like the parent was.