Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Getting It Out

I don't feel like I want to get anything out.  When I stomped my foot one of the times at the grocery store today, I didn't plan on it.  When I went to see Think Like a Man, I couldn't believe how affected I was by the person sitting next to me.  I just couldn't stand it.  The movie was exactly 2 hours long, too.  So, I moved to the very front side.  After I moved, I heard the whole theater laughing a lot of times.  At one point, I got very happy and felt like there was something around me.  Something else happened today.  I was in the kitchen, and the knife just moved off the plate.  Last night, I saw a black figure like they show in "Ghost Adventures" go across the street from where I ran from a gun.

The sad thing is I feel cool for stomping my feet and I think other people did as well.  I got mad that it mattered if I sounded even a little like when I make a noise like it says "lesbian" and all the time people are sounding like those words about me, but like saying it but not really, like taking it back.  It seems silly to follow.  I guess it's just a precaution so it doesn't come full out.  I'm trying to cope with it like that, but I know somehow, as soon as I do, it will become stronger, not necessarily if I keep my temper.

The other sad thing is I feel better too after doing that, like I know to cool down.  I know something will upset me.  I think my dad doesn't care so much because it made the trip more interesting.  I wasn't acting like a baby.  I just kinda stomped my foot.  It was pretty deliberate, though.

No comments:

Post a Comment