Saturday, May 19, 2012
Oh, no!
I have a scab from dried skin staying up tonight. It's the medicine!!! It's ruining my sleeping habits to take it in gaps of days.
Hungry After Supper
I shouldn't have had at least the hot dogs if I knew that's what I might have to eat today.
Now
I'm pigging out for my birthday. It might matter. We'll see if I'm still hungry for pizza today. 3 days in a row. I thought eating would put me to sleep. It does, sometimes, but I guess not now. I've heard it can wake you up. I've had a good night, and I've slept a lot already this week, I made sure. It's hard for me to sleep with an irregular schedule of medicine. I just got a lower dosage I can take more often now. If I take it, though, now, I'll sleep for like 10-12 hours. I should eat cold cuts or something. I need to go to the store with my dad, but since my brother is home from college I'm trying to keep to myself more. Maybe, I should pick something else to eat for the rest of my birthday, maybe go out to a restaurant for my birthday tomorrow. I kinda just wanna stay home, but I don't know what to eat. I wonder what would be appropriate. I kinda wanna go back to Olive Garden.
My Aunt Survived
The older aunt survived eating out and was a police. Her husband is an army colonel.
The younger aunt is taller than her and seems either naturally skinny or also seems to not eat too much. I don't know if she gets tired, but she is able to work.
The younger aunt is taller than her and seems either naturally skinny or also seems to not eat too much. I don't know if she gets tired, but she is able to work.
Mashed Potatos
For some reason, we haven't had that since we moved here almost, maybe, which is about 7 years. I used to never want to peel them because I was tired and not finished with my homework. I figured later that the chores could help, but I'm still worried I need the time for homework. I think I did. Maybe, we should have eaten more food. My mom seems to cater what seems to be popular to how we eat. I think I have a lot to catch up on. My mom was hoping I could work when I left college at 20, but I just don't feel I could stand it, doing nothing. I just don't feel good. I feel jittery, like I need something for my system. My parents are adamant about health. My dad even regretted not putting us on strict diets growing up, which sounds excruciating. My mom didn't have means like she did in Indonesia on what to eat.
Tea
Well, also, I had tea, but, for some reason, we stopped. I don't think I liked it a lot. I always acted up about it, but I didn't like whine whine.
The food might be better than some family's are seen to be...
...other families's eating habits...
We didn't have fast food other than Chick-fil-A before my brother was born. It was so neat. I lived in southeastern Florida, and it has the same feel today, in a way. I also liked the alcohol-free piña colada.
I don't understand why I had a hot dog, a whole hot dog, at age 2. What we have now is 25% fat. I was hungry, though, after the 1 hot dog and bowl of beef-flavored Ramon Noodles.
When I was young, I remember just having like plain chicken with ketchup, though I didn't want the ketchup. I knew that I could have had something else, but for some reason that was what we had. I guess it was neat to my dad to just have chicken, but I was a growing girl. I am thankful it was plain. I just don't see why I felt compelled to use the ketchup.
We didn't have fast food other than Chick-fil-A before my brother was born. It was so neat. I lived in southeastern Florida, and it has the same feel today, in a way. I also liked the alcohol-free piña colada.
I don't understand why I had a hot dog, a whole hot dog, at age 2. What we have now is 25% fat. I was hungry, though, after the 1 hot dog and bowl of beef-flavored Ramon Noodles.
When I was young, I remember just having like plain chicken with ketchup, though I didn't want the ketchup. I knew that I could have had something else, but for some reason that was what we had. I guess it was neat to my dad to just have chicken, but I was a growing girl. I am thankful it was plain. I just don't see why I felt compelled to use the ketchup.
"The Young and the Restless"
Today, I don't understand, I ate a lot. I guess I need a longer period of time of eating 3 meals a day.
Good Food
I dunno, I remember being very healthy before my brother was born. I don't know what happened. I don't know why my brother is like he is. Well, we might have started eating differently before he was born. I just remember feeling funny. I gained weight when I added ballet to just taking gymnastics. I wasn't that fat, but like it seems my head looked bigger and my face more rounded rather than gaunt. It's like I was butchered in ballet. I felt funny before that. I used to hurt so much in pre-school when I peeled skin that was already peeling off my fingers. For some reason, even though I knew I wasn't supposed to, I was addicted to putting "buggers" on the floor and sofa. In kindergarten, my dad told me later I was considered mentally retarded, kinda, but got in gifted. For some reason, the teacher's instructions flew over my head. I felt tired and just like I didn't fit in, like it affected me too much. I'm kind of the opposite as an adult.
Maybe, I should call it off with my grandma?
I do like talking to her every day, but I think she'll lose interest, after awhile.
My Grandma
I'm not sure why she thinks now is a good time for me to start talking every day to her. I am suspicious because she usually sends me a card a few days early, and I didn't get one for this birthday, yet. Maybe, she doesn't want to admit it's my birthday, again. She said she got my younger aunt a card late, as well. My older aunt didn't give me a card, neither. Neither did my younger aunt. I guess it was dishonest the way I've been being treated, for no reason, really. It happened all of a sudden, like if I get a little upset, close something like a cupboard a little harder, suddenly everyone changes. They hold onto things, too much.
Energy
Well, it seems that in order for me to function calling my grandma is a part of my life. I've had hard feelings because it's obvious to her I'm home to be with my parents and little brother when he's home from college. For some reason, like I'm still catching up on rest from school, the day goes by. It goes by quickly. If I'm awake in the day, I can end up preparing 3 meals. I do all the chores other than my parents's laundry and until I know how to use the vacuum cleaner. We have a dog, my brother's dog. I used to try to walk him, but I notice my mom does alone, again. I like having hours on end at the computer, and I have that time at night. Also, now that my brother is here, he is up until 3 A.M. So, when he goes to bed, I watch "The Ellen DeGeneres Show." I've been laying around idly and not calling my grandma as much. I skipped jogging the past few days, too. I only feel active if I call my grandma. We talk every day, normally. I need to feel active in order to get into a healthy sleep routine. I've had appointments, lately, stopping me. They are about over for now. That's what's been getting in the way. I used to even cancel all my doctor-like appointments so that I would never have a day leaving the house. However, I go to the movies with my dad on weekends. The dentist makes my teeth okay, too. When I skipped, I got stains. That might be a coincidence. I guess I can just accept the present and what comes with it.
I just might be drowsy tomorrow.
I'll be awake when I'm doing something. I hope I get to sleep! I thought I'd need to post on IMDb some to get tired. I just felt wide awake in bed.
I mean...
I mean to back me up since one night of sleep doesn't seem to do it. I know I won't be tired.
Waiting
I've been making sure I slept enough over a period of time just for this day. I should lie down soon.
Condiments for Tomorrow
I'm making sure I'm drinking enough water for tomorrow and am eating breakfast in the morning.
I'm uploading a new video of me singing.
It's kinda bad I see, but most of it is good in some way to me.
Okay, I just got my food.
My brother is up, too. I thought I'd be asleep by now, but I had a feeling kinda like the opposite of when I 1st moved to the New Orleans suburb.
Dessert
My aunt and I shared cake for dessert. I couldn't even finish my pizza. I think I'll go finish it now and that'll put me to sleep, though last time I had the 2 hot dogs and the hamburger it made me tired but then not for a long time. I did regret getting up. So, I guess I'll eat the pizza and breadsticks then come back and post on IMDb.
I wasn't tired at all, today.
My psychiatrist lowered my prescription back down by 25%. I may just have it every other day or cut it in half. He's gonna lower it again later. I may switch psychiatrists for medical insurance, but if we like this one we may stay.
I was tired after the "wine." Other than that, just a few bursts of being tired. I slept 20 hours one day and a lot the next, so. I'm also used to staying up late. I do feel like going to bed sometime. Maybe, I'll mellow down on IMDb.
I was tired after the "wine." Other than that, just a few bursts of being tired. I slept 20 hours one day and a lot the next, so. I'm also used to staying up late. I do feel like going to bed sometime. Maybe, I'll mellow down on IMDb.
I'm going to get plump plump plump this weekend I may die.
It's my birthday! :D
Pizza at Olive Garden today, pizza tomorrow, pizza the next day.
The past 2 days, I've had 2 hot dogs and a hamburger as once for extra food at night and wasn't full. The 1st time I also had a can of Chef Boyardee spaghetti and meatballs.
Pizza at Olive Garden today, pizza tomorrow, pizza the next day.
The past 2 days, I've had 2 hot dogs and a hamburger as once for extra food at night and wasn't full. The 1st time I also had a can of Chef Boyardee spaghetti and meatballs.
I'm packing 3 umbrellas.
For some reason, I feel like I'm not bringing much this time but did last time.
Didn't Really Like the Wine I Tried
It made me feel like I was gonna explode. I had wine with evaporated alcohol on food at Olive Garden.
Friday, May 18, 2012
New Photos of Me
I'm waiting until I have enough money to get Photobucket Pro since I upload so many pictures.
Flickr
or
Photobucket
Flickr
or
Photobucket
I might go to sleep soon.
Remember, I am gonna leave this afternoon until late tomorrow night. I'm not sure if I'll have idle time this afternoon.
I came back to reality
to live life and hope to be able to function at the same time as seeing the spectacular, for myself. I think it's always right to do what's right. Magic can take care of itself. I always had this feeling I shouldn't be somewhere, though. Like, I had to come home from college, for a long time, to catch up on sleep. It's been 6 years, though. Somehow, I'm improving greatly.
"Follow the Yellow Brick Road"
If you do what you're supposed to, you won't really be admitting unnecessary things. You'll discover magic! There's a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.
This Is Just the Beginning | How I Got to the Top in Life
If people did what they were supposed to, they would create or find another form of life, see magic seeping in and out somehow to how much they can accept it and still live feeling like a normal person or not. It's complicated to do what you're supposed to and can take time, apparently. I'm not admitting things that should not be admitted when I try to exemplify being cool! It might not be perfect. It might be. It's something that seeps in and out, as well. Supposedly, there's something called "practice." If you like something, you can do it over and over. Sure, details are important. Those things lead up to comfort. I guess I somehow blasted myself off this planet because of racial impossibility|discomfort.
Funny Implications
Why would someone imply that another person cares ... cares about being good? That's the 1st step, overcoming that obstacle.
I was listening to AOL Radio
and to classical Christmas music and was inspired to sing, but I guess I've lost my voice. I can sing, but it's not interesting.
Hamburger With Spices
I feel so much better, like my head it feels warm and calm and stimulated, after having a hamburger with spices. I get these thin buns, in wheat or grain. They even sell them as Goldfish, but we were shopping somewhere else. I'll have to look for the Goldfish ones next time.
Food
I'm cooking 2 hot dogs. They have a lot of fat. Good thing I'm not eating more than 2. I have them with bread, usually wheat|grain buns. I don't eat white bread. I would, like at a restaurant.
Time to Watch "The Ellen DeGeneres Show"
It's awfully late. I wonder when I will watch another TV show. Well, I need sleep for today and tomorrow and some the next day.
People from the Northeast
I hear people there are both nice and cranky. You know, the cranky people from up north.
The North
For some reason, I feel I connect there. To me, there are bad things about the north, but I've treated the south like life's playground.
I suppose, it must be different for people with parents from there in the earlier 1900s. I feel as though I'm not really from there, in a way. I've been staying home and just seeing my parents, who are not from the south.
I always wanted to live up north because I thought it was more goody good. I dunno, though, it seems racist. Still, if you like traditional chilly winters and crystal clear flowing streams, that must be a nice place to be.
I suppose, it must be different for people with parents from there in the earlier 1900s. I feel as though I'm not really from there, in a way. I've been staying home and just seeing my parents, who are not from the south.
I always wanted to live up north because I thought it was more goody good. I dunno, though, it seems racist. Still, if you like traditional chilly winters and crystal clear flowing streams, that must be a nice place to be.
Issues
So, it's settled, then, I'm from the south and went up north for college a little and regularly visited my relatives from up north. I was feeling off because of celebrities I found and people I've known probably who moved somewhere else when they were young. I think it makes a difference if you are born somewhere aside from where your parents are from. I never had that feeling of growing up like my parents. It seems others are more ingrained in their parents's heritage. I think the 1st few years of life are pretty formidable. I had a different experience than I would have otherwise. I did move within the same area under the age of 5. It made a difference. I guess I can identify with others who also grew up mostly in a place other than their parents are from. Anyway, when you move somewhere it totally knocks you out. So, I'm considered fully from the south with ancestral heritage up north.
Thursday, May 17, 2012
I might go eat now.
If I feel up to it, I may jog, too. I might take a shower and check in by around 1 P.M. Not sure.
Sleep & Out This Weekend
So, I might sleep more, not sure when. I have to go somewhere tomorrow around 3 P.M. I am going to bed when I get home. I'll be gone all day Saturday. I might go to bed earlier. Sunday, it's my birthday, so I'll be celebrating but probably still on the computer a significant amount. We'll see.
I told my grandma I might not talk this weekend, but she may call me on my birthday. I know I wanted to celebrate Mother's Day for my mom so didn't call then since I don't have to. I probably will next year. I kinda wanted to call her on my birthday, but I'm not sure how I'll feel after a busy weekend. Not sure, but just in case, since the situation seems suspicious, I told her. She'll call me, anyway. :/
I told my grandma I might not talk this weekend, but she may call me on my birthday. I know I wanted to celebrate Mother's Day for my mom so didn't call then since I don't have to. I probably will next year. I kinda wanted to call her on my birthday, but I'm not sure how I'll feel after a busy weekend. Not sure, but just in case, since the situation seems suspicious, I told her. She'll call me, anyway. :/
Sleeping
I'll probably sleep through the afternoon and maybe evening or some of it.
So, this might be good night.
So, this might be good night.
Lesson Learned
Take time for yourself? and don't listen to other people. Even if you trust them. Even if it seems the rules are changed? Some things stay the same.
Bare Facts
Essentially, if you're the one who's been earnestly signaled to do things to do with the person signaling, other people are feeding off what happened to you for doing it and never were tested like that. How can anyone be that convincing? I wonder if that's why a lot of people have quit doing what they used to do that was like out of the box. I miss those days, 1997 and 1998.
Figuring out Misunderstandings
People act like it's a big deal if I have a common misunderstanding. They do it in a way that makes it seem like it's my fault, but, in the end, I figure it out.
Missing the Point
I guess people are totally missing the point. They think of what I did in the right way and act like it's worthless, even if it's unimportant.
Another Big Thing
It seems like another big thing to respect others, like find some way to look up to them if you find some of their intelligence appealing.
It does seem like a big thing...
...not to listen to what other people are trying to say, even if I trust them.
Naughty Naughty
So, the "n" word thing only matters if the kid who the parents wanted me to call the "n" word to get it out even though that's not why I did it but because I thought they thought we should start using the word about me ... only matters if the kid knows and the kid knows because the parents are acting weak? I deleted it and wish I didn't say it. The dad is from L.A., and the mom is from England but part French and other things from her mom. I kinda had a feeling they would do something like that, relay the message.
I am glad, though, my dad decided to tell me they thought I was literally "retarded" or something in kindergarten, but he told me when I was like 15 or possibly older. I guess he fit it in, somehow. I guess the parents of the kid I'm talking about really did want me to do it, though, though in a way I think the mother made the message more crystal clear just to be sure I didn't decide to. I mean, she must have known the father might have been the one who made it so that someone who I guessed was him because I'd found an account with his name and stuff would keep cursing at me about my race over and over like it was okay and then I felt this issue.
I am glad, though, my dad decided to tell me they thought I was literally "retarded" or something in kindergarten, but he told me when I was like 15 or possibly older. I guess he fit it in, somehow. I guess the parents of the kid I'm talking about really did want me to do it, though, though in a way I think the mother made the message more crystal clear just to be sure I didn't decide to. I mean, she must have known the father might have been the one who made it so that someone who I guessed was him because I'd found an account with his name and stuff would keep cursing at me about my race over and over like it was okay and then I felt this issue.
@TheEllenShow - Chris Matthews
I like his show a lot. I see he also has roots in Pennsylvania and is Irish. For some reason, I was told I was very Irish.
I really like when someone on the show said, "Will the real Mitt Romney please stand up?" That's like the song that goes, "Will the real Slim Shady please stand up, please stand up, please stand up?" It must be fun to keep up with that stuff so that you remember it at a time like that. 8o
I really like when someone on the show said, "Will the real Mitt Romney please stand up?" That's like the song that goes, "Will the real Slim Shady please stand up, please stand up, please stand up?" It must be fun to keep up with that stuff so that you remember it at a time like that. 8o
I guess he was on twice.
There was her showing him making her fall dancing the day after the 1st visit and the day before the 2nd. I know about him because my dad watches him like every day. I tried watching it, but I'm always doing something else.
TV
I'm going back and watching Chris Matthews on "The Ellen DeGeneres Show" online. He was on it more than once, maybe 3 times. She posted about him on Twitter. It doesn't look like he was on, recently.
@TheEllenShow @SteveCarell - Good at Charades
Aw-hah. He's better than me. I don't think I'd be very good at that game, though I've played before. I don't remember what I did. D8 I couldn't even understand the thing you're supposed to make the gestures with!
@TheEllenShow - Make Your Day
E-mail this person: http://www.365daysofcoaching.com/resource_articles/celebration-declareday.htm Just click on the link at the bottom and then find her e-mail at the bottom of the next page.
National Sea Monkey Day D8! I got put in the mental hospital when I was about to buy some. So, I didn't get any.
You should make your day your birthday! I wonder how you are gonna go about picking what day to have.
National Sea Monkey Day D8! I got put in the mental hospital when I was about to buy some. So, I didn't get any.
You should make your day your birthday! I wonder how you are gonna go about picking what day to have.
TV
I guess my brother's watching about Steve Jobs and before robots. LOL, a robot in jail said, "I did not murder him!" to an African-American guy.
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